A consolidated trash talk & smack talk forum for fantasy football and co-dependent enabling of NCSU basketball. They only do it because they love us.
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
What. The. Fuck.
Shaq for Shawn Marion and a bag of Baked Lays? Shaq's still in the league? He can't run, can he? The Suns still run, don't they? What kind of fucking doofus decides this is the trade that's going to get you to the Finals? Goddamnit.
Its all a rouse for Steve Kerr to play again. If he gets Shaq, that clogs up the middle and then the need a plodding offense (See Triangle) where Steve Kerr doesn't have to move and jack up three's all day.
The espn radio discussion is that Shaq is for spot play, he probably won't take the court until playoffs to provide some extreme clogging in the paint and it also relieves a "who is the power forward" problem that the suns have right now with Marion and Stoudamire. It basically says that the Suns managment finally picked their team guy. . .
Who else in the western has been Shaq size since he went to Fla?
But here's the thing; you dance with what brung ya. Phoenix is a running team, you can do that with both Marion and with Amare. You CANNOT do that with 'The Fu'. He's too old, slow, and fat at this point. The Sun's entire offensive strategy is get it up and down the floor, shoot 3's, and make the other team outscore you. Is Shaq really going to help that?
Now, I know what you're thinking (those still reading); Shaq's purpose is for the playoffs, when teams slow things down and you have to play half court sets...
FUCK THAT FUCK THAT FUCK THAT FUCK THAT FUCK THAT!
Did everyone miss the point earlier where he's fat slow and lazy!?! (I need those goddamn upside down Mexican question marks right now)
He doesn't help your team! Not at all! He can't run, he can't rebound, he can't guard Duncan, and he's not even a sure bet to shoot over 52% from the floor anymore.
My only thought is that he's told someone that he's retiring after this year and that Phoenix will be able to wipe out his salary when he does that (I don't really know the salary cap rules in the NBA).
That said, he in no way, shape, or form brings them closer to an NBA title; fire Kerr now.
Also, now that I'm rolling, that there was talk of bringing in Garnett over the summer (probably for about the same price); is there anyone out there who doesn't think that that would have made more sense than 'The Diesel'? Has the whole world gone crazy?
While he's a fat shit now, he's never really played an up tempo game anywhere. Not Miami (obviously), not LA (triangle), and barely in Orlando when he was 275 and the most athletic freaknut on the planet.
However the most disturbing thing about him this year is he can't jump anymore. I mean he can barely dunk standing under the rim. He's freaking 7'1!
Unless they think his hip will heal soon, giving him some hops back I have no clue why this is beneficial to the Suns.
That is unless he's somehow pissed again, and wants to shove it down everyone's throats. And if that's the case then fuck him. Because if you can't get excited about playing with Dwyane Wade, then you're dead inside.
7 comments:
Big Steve just told me that @ work, and I'm like the dude on "Romancing the Stone": THEE Shawn Marion???
According to USA Today: "Because he turns 36 on March 6 and is 7 feet 1 and 325 pounds, O'Neal does not seem compatible with the Suns' offense."
You think? If he's 325, I'm 135. Fucker is at least three-fitty right now.
Its all a rouse for Steve Kerr to play again. If he gets Shaq, that clogs up the middle and then the need a plodding offense (See Triangle) where Steve Kerr doesn't have to move and jack up three's all day.
Or maybe he likes fattys.
The espn radio discussion is that Shaq is for spot play, he probably won't take the court until playoffs to provide some extreme clogging in the paint and it also relieves a "who is the power forward" problem that the suns have right now with Marion and Stoudamire. It basically says that the Suns managment finally picked their team guy. . .
Who else in the western has been Shaq size since he went to Fla?
But here's the thing; you dance with what brung ya. Phoenix is a running team, you can do that with both Marion and with Amare. You CANNOT do that with 'The Fu'. He's too old, slow, and fat at this point. The Sun's entire offensive strategy is get it up and down the floor, shoot 3's, and make the other team outscore you. Is Shaq really going to help that?
Now, I know what you're thinking (those still reading); Shaq's purpose is for the playoffs, when teams slow things down and you have to play half court sets...
FUCK THAT FUCK THAT FUCK THAT FUCK THAT FUCK THAT!
Did everyone miss the point earlier where he's fat slow and lazy!?! (I need those goddamn upside down Mexican question marks right now)
He doesn't help your team! Not at all! He can't run, he can't rebound, he can't guard Duncan, and he's not even a sure bet to shoot over 52% from the floor anymore.
My only thought is that he's told someone that he's retiring after this year and that Phoenix will be able to wipe out his salary when he does that (I don't really know the salary cap rules in the NBA).
That said, he in no way, shape, or form brings them closer to an NBA title; fire Kerr now.
Also, now that I'm rolling, that there was talk of bringing in Garnett over the summer (probably for about the same price); is there anyone out there who doesn't think that that would have made more sense than 'The Diesel'? Has the whole world gone crazy?
Disclaimer: The Spurs should have taken a mulligan for Game 5, gone to 7, and beaten the Suns fair & square.
That said, as a Timmy D fan - I got NO problem with Kazaam playing in the West.
While he's a fat shit now, he's never really played an up tempo game anywhere. Not Miami (obviously), not LA (triangle), and barely in Orlando when he was 275 and the most athletic freaknut on the planet.
However the most disturbing thing about him this year is he can't jump anymore. I mean he can barely dunk standing under the rim. He's freaking 7'1!
Unless they think his hip will heal soon, giving him some hops back I have no clue why this is beneficial to the Suns.
That is unless he's somehow pissed again, and wants to shove it down everyone's throats. And if that's the case then fuck him. Because if you can't get excited about playing with Dwyane Wade, then you're dead inside.
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