The worst thing to happen in sports in the last 30 years would be if Tiger Woods was on steroids, right? Why doesn't anyone make mention of this? There are way too many people now who don't look like they are on roids who are, so who the hell knows.
Sidekick note: Stupid long comment after the jump, probably should have just made a separate post
2 comments:
The only person I could come up with that might be a bigger story is President Obama.
Although finding out Woods used PEDs could be fantastic for a variety of reasons:
1) To watch both Lupica's and Bayless' heads explode.
2) To watch the media shitstorm that would rain down on all of us (seriously, how would they handle this since everyone loves Woods but hates the idea of steroids?). All the damn stories about Jack's records, and the green jackets, cheating the fans, blah, blah, blah
In fact, the only interesting story I could see would be one related to some remarks made by Greg Norman last week. He was railing on how the tour let technology run wild the last decade and how that ruined a ton of really good golf courses (continually lengthening them, moving traps and trees, turning them into completely different courses than how they were originally designed). Honestly, what is the difference between all of these technological improvements in the equipment these guys use, and the improvements they could make to themselves with steroids or HGH (other than the fact that some arbitrary body has decided that one is OK, but the other isn't)?
3) How many sportswriters would start buying golfers multiple rounds of drinks to get them to talk shit about Tiger (Steven Ames - "I knew something had to be up when he beat me 9 and 8"), and how does Tiger respond? Imagine the interview Man-Boobs could give at that point (recall the one in Golf Digest when Tiger switched to all Nike clubs).
4) Speaking of Woods' response, what the hell would that press conference be like? Tiger actually understands how to use the media, unlike Arod, so how would he spin this to his advantage (could he)?
5) Would this finally put an end to all the steroid stories? If that came out, it would be pretty obvious that every single sport that relied on human strength/conditioning would have been "tainted". FFS, we already can assume there are pro golfers that do it; if they feel they need it, is there any pro competition that doesn't use it?
6) What does Finchem do? Suspend him? Hope everything dies down? Strip him of all of the various titles he's won? Is that then the end of pro golf as a marketable sport in the US? Could Woods even continue playing in the US?
7)To see the size of the fruit baskets that Bonds and Arod (and possibly Lance Armstrong) send to Tiger.
I actually almost want it to happen now.
1.) Of course. but only if their heads actually did explode because the are d-bags.
2.) I would agree. The only slight difference is everyone is allowed to use the same equipment and its not against the law. If steroids were legal and everyone could use them, there would be a bitchfest, just not as big.
3.) No doubt about going after him. Man boobs has tons of talent and zero between the ears. He tried to give away the lastr tournament and his first round match against Cabrera. The stupid thing is Mickleson just shit ont he clubs and complemented by basically saying he'd kick our ass even more if he was using good clubs.
4.)That to me would be the most interetsing thing. It boggles my mind thinking about it, like when I'm trying to figure out if there is a higher being. Maybe he'd blame his dad saying that he trusted him fully and was injected by him.
5.)I'd think it'd be the nail in the coffin. Plus now that its established that some form of steroids have been around since the 20's and clearly in America since the 60's, who can be trusted. Hell in the 60's it was actually legal to possess.
6.)I take it back, this would be the most interetsing thing. They love him so much, the press would try to spin it with a few wanting to shoot him.
7.) That would be too funny.
It would be very sad to see something like that happen. And from my perspective more people worldwide love Tiger than Obama. at least Tiger isn't reducing our mortgage deduction.
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